It’s important that kids be allowed to make their own choices as they grow older. This helps them develop their decision-making skills, which they’ll need throughout their lives.
But it’s also necessary to give them a framework in which they can make those choices. That includes communicating clear rules and boundaries, and also helping them see why you’ve imposed these limits.
Exploration
The Partnership to End Addiction explains that when discussing such challenging topics as nicotine, alcohol, or drugs, “it’s not about having a one-time ‘drug talk,’ but rather tackling the subject through more frequent, organic conversations that evolve as your child gets older.”
Without constantly harping on the subject, therefore, look for natural ways to introduce such issues. If a major entertainment figure is arrested for drugs, this would be a logical gateway to asking what they think about it.
Or if you’re with your child and notice some kids vaping, you might ask whether any of their friends vape and express your concern at what they’re doing.
Education
At any age, you first need to find out what your child knows about the dangers of drugs, tobacco, and alcohol.
“I know a lot of kids these days are experimenting with marijuana. What have you heard about it?”
From there you’ll know what they don’t know about the associated dangers. If they say they’ve heard that marijuana is harmless, for example, you can give them facts about its negative impact on the developing brain.
Consequences
Kids can learn to make healthy choices when they have the facts. But they also need their parents to back them up in their choices. That means laying out clear consequences for breaking rules.
At the same time, let them know that if they do make a poor choice, you won’t become overly emotional. Tell them that they can talk to you about anything at any time, “even if you do make a mistake or feel stuck in a situation and need our help. We won’t freak out and, together, we’ll figure out a way to help you.”
Teaching kids how to make responsible choices is one of the topics in this month’s Family Table Time kit. The other topics are study habits, encouragement, and community service.
These kits contain a wealth of useful materials specially designed to bring families closer together. For a free one-month sample kit, contact us.