When we think of summertime, we think of dads coaching ballgames, dads fishing with the kids, dads at the grill flipping burgers. This stereotype of the “typical” father is reinforced every Father’s Day.

But fathers need to play more than just cameo roles in their kids’ lives. And most do. But not enough Dads are encouraged to be full-time parents. One of the most offensive phrases used in describing fathers is that they are “babysitting” their own children as if they’re only there to stand in for the “main” parent.

Co-equal parenting

“Fathers are not just helpers for mothers but are important to children in their own right,” wrote Duke University research professor Jennifer E. Lansford, Ph.D., in Psychology Today.

A great deal of research backs her up.

According to the University of Wisconsin-Madison’s Institute for Research on Poverty, the benefits of what it terms “involved fathering” confers myriad benefits:

“In numerous studies, positive father involvement is associated with children’s higher academic achievement; greater school readiness; stronger math and verbal skills; greater emotional security; higher self-esteem; fewer behavioral problems; and greater social competence than found among children who do not have caring, involved fathers.”

Other research shows that, when dads are actively involved, their kids avoid using drugs, delay sexual activity, stay in school, and avoid criminal activity.

Society contributes

Of course, society plays a role in shunting fathers to one side. Books, television, and magazines are rife with parenting tips for moms, like the “Mommy Minute” featured on local news shows. The Internet is awash with websites by and for moms, like “37 Parenting Tips Every New Mom Needs.”

Most companies support mothers with paid maternal leave. Fathers typically aren’t eligible. Lansford notes that Finland, Iceland, Norway, and Sweden are among the few countries that offer paternal as well as maternal leave following the birth or adoption of a child.

So is it any wonder that fathers often see themselves as an afterthought in their children’s lives?

Getting Dad involved

The solution is for society, and moms in particular, to see fathers as a co-parent and not just a “helper.”

Dads need to become involved in all aspects of a child’s life: changing diapers, getting up with your child at night, reading books, telling stories, taking your child to the doctor and on play dates, sharing drop-offs and pick-ups, and helping with homework, among other activities.

And both parents need a strong, supportive relationship with each other to foster effective co-parenting.